Monday, April 2, 2012

April Fool's Day is stupid

Unlike my sister who, admittedly, made a very cute backwards dinner for her kids yesterday, I have never  been a fan of this most useless of pointless of mean-spirited and downright stupid "holiday".

The MOST useless you say?  What about Feb. 29 you ask?  Hey, man, back off.  Feb. 29 is too cool, it happens once every four years, like Presidential elections, Olympics, and World Cup...all which are much less cool than Leap Year, so by default, Feb. 29 is better than April 1. Plus, if my birthday was on Feb. 29, I wouldn't be 40 fucking years old.  I feel you, Cameron.

 Kathleen, 1, imaginary readers, 0.

The main reason I hate April Fool's is that I am a particularly gullible sort, and easily embarrassed, therefore, I do not like tricks played on me.  And most April Fool's Day pranks are designed to confuse the witless, and embarrass the already socially awkward members of our society of which I am included.

Also, they are just plain fucking mean and created in order to make people look and feel like assholes.  I feel like that enough already by myself on any given day, I don't need a whole day dedicated to people trying to remind me of that.  I'd rather watch a video of a kid whacking his dad in the nuts with a baseball bat on an endless loop for 24 hours than spend the whole damn day being suspicious of everything and anything I see and/or hear:  "Oh, really, Mom's feet fell off and she needs to go to the emergency room?  Try again, sister!"

And honestly, are the "pranks" ever really clever or funny?  Can you remember one that worked ever that caused you to laugh hysterically, or did you just think "Wow...that's kinda mean" or worse, "Damn...HOW much time did they spend on that colossal fail of a trick?"  Not one, I'd wager.

That being said, while perusing Gawker, I did come across one particular April Fool's Day joke that was cute, harmless, clever, and made me feel good instead of cringing internally.

May I present: Warby Barker, designer eyewear for dogs.

How cute is that pug with a monocle?  Damn cute, that's how much.  See, this is what I'm talking about, people.  So next year, aim high.  Strive for pranks that make people feel better, or feed them delicious backwards meals that look like something they're not, and are creative, and tasty.

Although my tastebuds would be very confused and suspicious...and I'd probably react with a distrustful "I don't like it" like my three year old niece, but at least I could verbalize to you how much I appreciated the effort.

**Updated: see, I'm not the only one.  Dooce feels my pain.

1 comment:

  1. OMG, that arm hanging out of her car was hilarious! I had planned to terrify my children all day, but the lazies got to me, and the dinner was the most I could muster. Maybe next year.


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