Saturday, April 6, 2013

C is for cookies...





That's good enough for me; however, it is not good enough for the Rottenator.  Mr. "We need to save money for a second car and Harry Potter blah blah blah" would not touch a left-over even if it slapped him in the face and demanded to be eaten.

I don't get it.  I can make a beef stew on Sunday, and still be snacking on it for lunch on Tuesday.

The Rottenator, however, is convinced that bacteria starts forming on meat within two hours of it being prepared so he won't touch it.

HOWEVER, he will chow down on a chocolate peanut butter Reeses bunny like it's nobody's business if it's left in a cabinet for more than one day.

He ate the face first.  Then finished off the rest of it with abandon.

I relayed this information to my mother who happened to mention that I may possibly have food issues (duh!) and this particular "all the food in the universe is mine don't touch it or I'll cut you" impulse is heriditary.

Good to know I'm crazy for a reason.  It seems my father was the same way.  In fact, the Mother relayed an incident wherein my father and my godfather left their chocolate bunnies in the refridgerator for more than one hour and she devoured them both and my dad freaked the fuck out. With good reason.  My mother's explanation:

"Well I warned them."  Are you kidding me?  THAT IS NO EXCUSE!!!!

It was MY chocolate peanut butter bunny and there will never be another one like it and you took it from me and now you must suffer and possibly die.

Those are the consequences of touching MY food.

Tell me people, who is right in this situation?  And if you say that it's anyone other than me, believe me, I know how to cut a bitch.

My Mood Ring(tone) Of The Day:


2 comments:

  1. When it comes to chocolate it better be in the house when I want it.

    ReplyDelete
  2. I read a few months ago that chocolate produces opoid-like effects for some people. My husband is one of them. I buy it for him and he inhales it. I'm sure he'd inject it if I brought home a liquid form.

    ReplyDelete

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