Thursday, February 14, 2013

My Bloody Valentine

My philosophy on Valentine's Day (and feel free to disagree if you dare)...

  1. It is a manufactured holiday created by Hallmark.
  2. It is for women only.
  3. It is a peer pressure competition.
  4. It should mean nothing but it does.
  5. It is the one day of the year where men actually have to take two seconds to think about the women in their lives and appreciate them.
  6. If you claim that you don't want anything for Valentine's Day then you are a female who has obviously had amazing Valentine's Days in your past and that is the only reason why you feel free to not celebrate it this year. Or, you are a big fat liar.
Suffice to say, I did not receive anything for Valentine's Day this year.  And because I have always been the loser fat girl loner who never had an amazing Valentine's Day, I was pissed.

Because this time should be my time, I have a fiance, we just got a bulk of our lost money back, and therefore, I was primed and ready for a semi-decent celebration of my awesomeness.

Alas.  There were no gifts for Kathleen this year; there were no roses or chocolates, or, quite frankly, any celebration whatsoever of my awesomeness. Because the Rottenator was "tired" and he "meant to, but not today, maybe this weekend, it was on his list of things to do..."

Whatever.  Meanwhile I was dealing with a day full of balloons, flowers, chocolates, and edible arrangements confronting me around every corner by every female that ever existed in my office building.

And the endless postings on Facebook by luckier women than I who had the nerve to post pictures of the fantabulous gifts bestowed upon them by their grateful partners.

I believe my breaking point was when I read the post on Facebook by that really annoying girl that I've known since highschool.  You know the one who is still the most useless creature that every existed on this planet whose claim to fame is the fact that she used to eat her own hair?

Yeah, so even she received a beautiful bouquet of roses from her clueless husband. And all that would have made me happy would have been a plastic gas-station purchased rose.  And perhaps a Reese's Cup.  King-sized.

So, okay.  After much suffering, heartfelt apologies and grovelling in general, the Rottenator was forgiven.  And I have been promised that this error in judgement will never happen again.  And that every holiday from Easter until the day I die will be splendiferous.

So, come March 31st, I'd better have a Hello Kitty Easter basket bigger than my head.  And positively overflowing with live bunnies and chicks.

My Mood Ring(tone) of the Day:

1 comment:

  1. Oh, Kathleen. I have said it so many times before. *Boys are dumb.* I mean, WTF? I say don't forgive him. Well, not completely. You deserve to have someone reassure you that you are loved. It is not too much to ask. He had all fucking year to think about it. I mean he could pick up a fucking card in the grocery store when he bought milk.
    My mom always said that men need to be "trained" (for lack of a better word) and it is the woman's job to do it.
    MAKE him show that he gives a shit. Why? Because it is important to you. You are totally correct in saying that it shouldn't matter but it does. Damn right it does.

    Anyway, from one fat loser loner girl to another,

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    ¨ ¨ ¨ ¨ ¨ ¨◄ƒ░░░░░░ o")
    ¨ ¨ ¨ ¨ ¨ ◄ƒ░░░(────.·^
    ¨ ¨ ¨ ¨ ¨ ◄ƒ░░░§ ´
    )\¨ ¨ ¨ ¨ ◄ƒ░░░░§ ¨ ¨ ¨✺✺✺
    ) \ ¨ ¨ ¨◄ƒ░░░░░§¨ ¨ ¨\|//✺
    );;\ ¨ ¨ ◄ƒ░.︵.░░░§__(((
    );;;\¨ ¨◄ƒ░(░░)\______//

    Happy Valentine's Day!


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